Female profanities!!!

I consider myself to be a well travelled man and during my travels have always picked up on the use of foul language by the natives of whichever country I may be in, and I am now willing to make claim that the Argentines are second to known on this planet when it comes to swearing, cursing and general profane conduct of language. This revelation occurred to me following my visit to El Monumental, the home stadium of River Plate FC, on Sunday, where I not only witnessed a rather boring game of football, but also heard the most hideous things coming from the mouths of many a young lady in the crowd…….many of which are far to shocking to put into words here. But this it seems is the norm wherever you go, as you wander the streets or board a collectivo one can hear such profanities being aired from school kids to a group of 60 year old women discussing their days to one another. However the language does not seem to have the swearing harshness of English and so nobody appears ever to be insult of disturbed, which is how it should be I guess!! Returning to the football, here is clip for anyone interested of the River Plate fans…..look closely you might see me!!!

Anyway, back to Bueno, entonces after a 3 day rest and plenty of practice of course, mainly with the in-laws and attempting to understand the songs at the football. Today’s lesson, once we had bypassed David’s ever so troublesome story, which Jimena showed no sympathy towards, of visiting the wrong town, La Plata instead of Mar del Plata, for the weekend, was rather brief but informative. Once again another element of confusion for the foreigner when learning Spanish, and today’s little gem focused mainly on the that there are 2 forms of the verb “to be”, Ser and Estar, with ser being predominantly for permanent situations and estar for temporary, however of course this is not a full proof explanation and unfortunately I am not in the position to put it into words myself…….so you’ll have to begin studying Spanish yourself with Bueno, entonces or just give up and forget about it altogether.

This took up the majority of the lesson although there was a good amount of vocabulary relating to towns and cities and apparently the word manzana, which up until now I had been lead to believe solely meant apple, also means block…..interesting!

La tercera semana repaso!

Seeing as class 17 was a short one and the fact that these days I am anti work and study at the weekend, I went ahead with the Bueno, entonces weekly review lesson. As all good reviews should be Jimena briefly covered all of the topics which she had attempted to teach to David during the past week……with such topics being, personal descriptions, ropa, colores, adjetivos, meses, estaciones del año, la clima y el verbo gustar! And as appears to be the norm with these reviews the topics were reviewed through the format of games, which make the process of learning Spanish less intense and often somewhat more enjoyable.

Also learnt today, which can be confusing to the learner, that it is the norm to here people referring to the language of Spanish as both Espanol and Castellano, and I was once told by a former student of mine about Castilian language…..however like David on many occasions in today’s class, my mind wandered and I still have no idea of the differences and reasons…..for that I will stand by the simpler Espanol!

In general a good weeks review even though both the student and profesora seemed a little absent minded, perhaps due to Jimena conducting the class from the comfort of her jacuzzi, and should this situation contain any element of truth then I fully understand David’s waywardness. In my eyes the weekend begins Viernes por la tarde so three full days of practising possibilities before restarting on Lunes with the fourth week of Bueno, entonces.

Enjoy.

Everywhere you go, you always take the weather…

In all honesty I do not have a lot to say about today’s class (17) as it was the shortest of them all so far in the Bueno, ennotnces course, which wasn’t such a bad thing. The focus for today was the weather, a topic that is of high importance in any language or culture. Wherever you are and whoever you are with, one can always open a conversation, make small talk or fill an uncomfortable pause with a discussion of the current weather, or clima, conditions……whether the weather is good or bad people the world over love to complain, and none better than those of my home nation, although I did notice a certain amount of angst here, in Buenos Aires, last summer from the locals, but then again when its 42C and you have to squeeze onto the Subte at 2pm it is not a lot of fun for anybody!

Other than the weather and seasons there was a little input from the Profesor about Dependent Prepostions and something else on Dipthongs, but I’ll have to watch those parts again as I switched off after the horrendous translation of the hideous Madonna song Like a Virgin!

Regarding the story of the student, David and the Profesora, Jimena, they seem to be appealing more to each other although David is perhaps not doing himself any favours with repeated reamarks about his vecinita linda…..but then again I’m not bothered either way!

Nos vemos.

Vamos al shopping?…no, no quiero!!

Today I awoke with the good intention of loading up my Ipod with the Bueno, entonces class and having a relaxing morning sat in the nearby park, however it is fairly f*$&ing cold this morning so I remained inside. It is still pleasing to know that I have the chance to take the full video classes on the road with me when the time comes, an option unique to Bueno, entonces and unavailable to Rosetta Stone users. And while we are on the subject, I came across an offer to buy Rosetta Stone cheap, although was still more expensive than the $147 price for the downloadable Bueno, entonces package. In case you haven’t seen it already check out this little comparison chart!

So lesson 16 today, already the second half of the Spanish learning program, the time has passed fairly quickly, and today I was treated to a lesson on shopping. To be honest this one is more for the ladies as we all know that the female race are more inclined to increase excitement levels when out in the abundance of shopping malls and stores aligning the streets of Palermo Hollywood! However the lesson was not without its use as I now feel well equipped to provide convincing replies when my girlfriend returns from a shopping spree (which is fortunately not too often) and asks me questions about the camisas, vestidos, zapatos and other such things, like my favourite clothing word bombachas (knickers). There were also a lot of colours discussed today and the fact that in Spanish, some colours agree in gender and number with the noun, some only in number and some not at all…..confusing I know…..even more so when you are unable to distinguish between each colour on the screen…..looked like a kaleidoscope of rainbows to me…..lucky that Bueno, entonces are smart enough to include the colour-blind friendly English translations at the bottom of the screen!

My old friend the Profesor MC Grammar was once again on hand to provide more insightful and invaluable knowledge with today’s focus on Direct and Indirect Objects Pronouns….lo, la, los, las and so on and so forth! This is something which I find myself having frequent trouble with and any attempt usually results in me breaking out into the classic 90s reggae/dance track Sweat (A la la la la long) by Inner Circle…..but I’m all for reliving the teenage years!!

Laters.

15! La vecinita!!

Ok, so yesterday I gave the Bueno, entnonces team and lesson a bit of a slating but today I am happy to report that the class was far more enjoyable and therefore given my undivided attention. As ever, to start us off, there was the usual spiel from David, with him today focusing on his, apparently, rather attractive vecina (neighbour)…..for this he is most fortunate as my vecinos consist of the building portero, who could talk the hind legs off a donkey (most of which I struggle to grasp) and two 60 something sister who while away their days with either accompanying vocals to classic Argentina Tango or hurling profanities at the days live sports events…..never a dull moment however!

The focus of this lesson was people, descriptions and attributes, the use of ser and tener, eg sos muy gordo y tenes una panza de cerveza, and a large amount of relating vocabulary. David seems to have trouble in remembering when to use an O for masculine or an A for feminine words, and I can sympathise deeply as often tend use them at random and when pleases me….which, depending on the degree of ridiculousness, can be of either great amusement or frustration for my locally raised girlfriend.

Something I love about languages is directly translating words back into English, and today was not without a fine example……the Spanish word for glasses, as I have found out today, is anteojos, which in my own mother tongue would be…..before eyes…..another masterstroke of linguistic genius!

All good then…..I’m off to practice the pronunciation of my explosive B, D and G’s at the beginning of words!

La telenovela continúa!!

No work, the weather is fairly offish and am home alone so what else better to do with my time than another episode, numero 14, of the Spanish immersion course that is Bueno, entonces. The lesson today however did start off immensely boring with David spurting so much chamuyo that I found myself watching the grass grow in the garden for a good 5 to 10 minutes……apparently there are some issues with his mother but it is becoming some what monotonous……if you are into watching soap operas then am sure this could be for you……unfortunate as it may be, I am not!!

Once the initial rant was over and Jimena got down to business the continuation of the lesson proved to be both informative and useful, with the usual amount of language concepts discussed. Today we learnt more verb conjugations, with today’s being seguir (to follow), conseguir (to obtain) and perseguir (to pursue), adverbs of frequency, very useful, such as nunca, casi nunca, de vez en cuando y siempre, and the simple fact that by taking an adjective and adding mente you give yourself an adverb!! There was also a snippet from the Profesor about double negative usage in Spanish which is against the norm for an English speaker but is just another aspect of language learning which adds character and uniqueness and makes it so interesting!!

Favourite phrase of the day, which made me chuckle for no apparent reason, although sounds debateable, was that the splits translates to abrir las piernas (to open the legs)……surely it can’t be that simple and there is another funky expression for this!?

Una nueva semana y clase 13!!

And once again another week begins in the fine city of Buenos Aires and so another instalment of the Buenos, entonces language classes. Today was fairly hectic and I must say that had I not had previous knowledge of the conjugation and usage of such verbs as gustar then I would definitely need to watch this episode again. In my opinion, for people using these Spanish lessons with no previous experience of the language, this class went a little too fast and at times would therefore be a little confusing for the student. As ever David and Jimena were at their best to make things as simple and easy to follow but I cant help but think that Bueno, entonces users might benefit from some sort of “picture – text” recognition exercises, as are present in the likes of Rosetta Stone……but then of course it would not be possible to complete these via the fully portable audio Ipod option….ups and downs for every scenario!

This aside Bueno, entonces still retains its entertainment value and always comes up trumps with its decision to teach away from the norm and include topics such as slang……with today’s selection of useful phrases/words being caradura (jackass), desfachatada (jerk), cararrota (asshole or broken face for a literal translation) and sinverguenzas (shameless)…..with the latter being by far the more formal of insults!!

We also, today, had a little song from Jimena attempting to teach David the different vowel pronunciations existing within the Spanish alphabet, what seemed like a ton of other verbs which follow the same format as gustar, with encantar and qedar being but a few examples and the lesson also touched on 3 verbs with similar meanings parecer (to seem), pensar (to think) and creer (to believe) which so far to me have appeared as though they can all be interchanged without causing any major issues in a conversation…..although perhaps those on the receiving end of my attempts have just been appeasing me!

A mi me gusta la comida…….homemade milanesa…..just one of many fine Argentina dishes I have come to discover!

Pobre Diego y pobre Argentina!!

So it’s Sunday lunchtime and seeing how this country is one fully loaded with football lovers, one can only imagine the anguish and despair felt across the nation this morning following last nights rather humiliating 3-1 defeat at the hands of arch enemies Brazil, leaving the Argies with a small but significant mountain to climb in order to qualify for the 2010 World Cup. Mr Maradona, as much as a hero on the playing field you were to the likes of myself, it seems your managerial talents have once again been measured and found wanting…..but there is still hope…..and fortunately England continued their winning streak so I am able to write this with plenty of confidence!!

Anyway on with el repaso for the second week of the Bueno, entonces… Spanish course. As in the previous week the review is conducted via a telephone call between an, it seems, rather run down David, and the ever tolerant Jimena. And again as of last week plenty of information in this quite comprehensive Spanish learning program……I wonder whether Rosetta Stone or others have weekly reviews like this? Something to investigate perhaps!!

Today then the review covered some matters which I, and I hope other Spanish learners, have a certain amount of confusion with: 1. Possessive Pronouns – in Spanish I’m told, by the Profesor, these agree in gender and number with the object being possessed and whereas in English we think of “possessing things” in Spanish it is more passive with “things being possessed!, 2. Indirect and Direct Pronouns – with these I just become more confused than a chicken in a pillow factory and am forever putting the pronouns in the wrong place or relating to the wrong person, so thanks for covering this again Buenos, entonces!, 3. E and I – once again pure confusion enters the frame and I’m forever having to go with the old school “was that E for Elephant or I for Island” when being spelt a word……I’ll get there though….eventually.

Once more, as in last weeks review, I will ask the question, can I learn Spanish from these lessons?? I do feel I am improving and developing more confidence so for now I would have to say yes…..so here’s hoping the next few weeks provide further improvement.

Te diste cuenta…………

…………that there are between 18 and 54 verb tenses in this language……..well at least thats what I think the Profesor has so kindly informed me this morning!! Certainly something to contemplate in my continued quest to learn Spanish…..so come on Bueno, entonces this is your chance to shine and prove to me, and the rest of the Gringos, that your classes are the best and fastest way to learn Spanish….and in turn superior to such competitors as Rosetta Stone and Pimsleur!!

Regradless of this drastic new found verb related knowledge the Profesor as ever was able to play down the difficulties and put me at ease…..and as he said, I’ll just have to get used to the fact that often when I think someone is saying that they are going to call me, te llamo, in actual fact they will be asking if my brother called me yesterday, te llamó!! It’s only practice afterall!

Other useful points of todays class were the conjugations of tener, poder and querrer……irregular of course giving directions with imperatives and the differences in the questionning forms: dónde hay? and dónde esta?….with the first being for general information as in: dónde hay un banco? (where is there a bank?)….and the latter for specifics: dónde está el banco HSBC? (where is the HSBC bank?)

Jimena it seemed was a little frustrated with David today, perhaps due to him claiming to be sick or that she was having to look at the horrendous shirt he was wearing…..which has done nothing to dispell my belief that far too many British people get dressed in the dark!!

Laters!